


In My Head

by havokwritesstuff



Series: yanderepeterparker (blog) [9]
Category: DCU, Titans (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Jealousy, Mentions of Sex, Obsessiveness, oblivious idiots, soft yandere
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:00:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22856638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/havokwritesstuff/pseuds/havokwritesstuff
Summary: Jason Todd is a little too into you.
Relationships: Yandere Jason Todd x Reader
Series: yanderepeterparker (blog) [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1624429
Kudos: 120





	In My Head

When Jason first met you, he didn’t really think all that much of you. You were just one of Dick’s friends. Dick’s attractive friend, sure, but not someone he really expected to have any real connection to. All of you moved into Titans Tower after Trigon and Jason got to know you a bit better, seeing you joke around with Gar, who you’d known for years apparently, and chat with Rachel. You tried to talk to him often and he wasn’t very receptive, but about two weeks in, all of that started to change.

The four younger members of the “New Titans” were in the training room, you and Rachel sparring with wooden swords and Jason and Gar doing the same. Jason flipped over Gar to avoid a hit and landed behind the boy, only to hit his legs and knock him to the mat. “Ouch…” Gar groaned as he pushed himself off the floor.

“You’re kinda shit at this, dude,” Jason taunted, hand on his hip.

Gar rolled his eyes and prepared to respond when Dick came into the room. “Rachel, Gar, I need to talk to you for a second. (Y/N) and Jason, keep at it.”

“Is it about a mission?” Jason was really eager to be a part of things, to know what was going on. If there was a potential mission, he wanted to be in on it. He hadn’t been at the tower long, but he was also starting to get a little stir crazy.

“No, no missions yet.” Dick led Gar and Rachel out, leaving you and Jason alone. He watched them leave as you came closer to him, turning as he felt your presence.

You gave him an almost apologetic look. “Just to warn you, I’m even worse at this than Gar.”

“I’ve noticed.” He moved into a fighting stance and smirked at you. “Give me your best shot.“

You did just as he said, going in for a hit and instantly ending up down on the mat. Then it happened again. And again. Finally, after a few rounds of that, you pushed yourself up off the floor for the last time, breathing heavily. “This was a terrible idea. You’re way too good at this.”

An unfamiliar feeling flashed in Jason’s chest at your words, but it was gone as quickly as it came. “That’s true, but you’re also just really bad.”

“Gee, thanks.” You rolled your eyes, but there was still a smile on your face. “How long have you been doing this anyway? The whole Robin thing, I mean. Unless you trained before that, which I wouldn’t doubt because you’re kind of a badass…”

There the feeling was again, and it lingered a little while longer. Jason cleared his throat awkwardly as he tried to push it away. “A little over a year.”

You nodded, looking impressed. “And to think that all I’ve done in the past year is play video games with Gar. Until we joined up with Dick, Rachel, and Kory, of course.”

“Well, maybe I can teach you some moves.”

“I’d like that.”

Rachel’s voice suddenly came from the door, startling you. The two of you turned to see her walking back in with Gar in tow. “Hey, we’re back. Having fun?”

“Yeah, I’m having a lot of fun getting my ass kicked.” You looked at Jason. “Speaking of, you ready for another round?”

Jason got back into position, the smirk on his face once again. “Hell yeah.”

—-

Since that day, Jason’s opinion towards you had changed. You were so nice to him, nicer than anyone else, and you didn’t even really know him. You didn’t see him as the lesser Robin like everyone else, never comparing him to Dick. When you were in the room, he was painfully aware of your presence, and if you weren’t, you were often on his mind anyway. He fucking hated it, that warm feeling in his chest when you spoke to him or he thought of you, but it wouldn’t go away.

Unless the feeling was replaced with something else, which only happened when he saw you with Gar. The two of you were basically inseparable, having lived together before Dick picked you up. Everyone in the tower knew that you saw each other as siblings, but that knowledge didn’t make Jason feel better. He liked Gar well enough, but a frustrating piece of him wanted to be around you. To hear you praise him again like you had in the training room.

That’s why that disgusting sensation filled him when he found you in the living room with Gar, sitting next to him on the couch and playing some video game. He leaned against the wall and observed with his arms crossed and jaw tense, but couldn’t help the tiny smile that appeared on his lips when you jumped up from the couch and cheered. He watched the scene in front of him, the nice feeling overpowering the bad one. “Woo! In your face, Logan!”

“What ever happened to trying to be a humble winner?” Gar asked, chuckling as you dance like a dork.

“I changed my mind when I hit you with that blue shell.” You smirked at him as you dropped back onto the couch. “Ready to lose again?”

“I’m gonna pass,” he replied as he stood up and stretched. “Rachel and I have plans.”

“Cool. I’m glad you guys are talking again.”

“Me too. See you later, (Y/N/N).” Gar nodded towards you as he walked out, and you watched him go, spotting Jason standing there.

“Hi, Jason. Wanna play?” You asked, grinning brightly and holding up the controller that Gar had abandoned on the coffee table.

“Sure.” It slipped out of his mouth before he could even think about it, but he didn’t mind it all that much once he sat down next to you. He found himself glad that the other boy was gone so that he could be alone with you.

You handed him the controller and your fingers brushed sending a spark through him. It wasn’t painful though, just _different_. Apparently his face had given it away, because your smile morphed into a guilty frown. “Shit, I’m sorry. That just happens sometimes. It didn’t hurt, did it?”

Jason knew about your powers, how you could generate and manipulate electricity, but the most he’d seen was the lights flickering sometimes. He was intrigued before and even more so after feeling your power for himself. “No, I’m fine.” He noticed you subtly angle your body away from him, guilt radiating off of you, but he tried not to let it bother him, choosing instead to nod towards the tv. “I don’t know how to play this…”

The smile was back on your face. “Oh, it’s easy. I’ll give you a crash course.” Jason listened intently as you explained the controls and what the different items did, the excitement in your voice making that pleasant feeling blossom. He tried to ignore it, but it got worse when the first race started and he spotted you out of the corner of his eye, your tongue poked out through your lips in concentration.

Despite his best efforts, he only got 5th place while you won once again. He expected you to react like you did when you beat Gar, but you didn’t. “That was really good! I’m sure you’ll get even better if you play some more.”

Jason smiled just slightly, fighting to keep from blushing. He didn’t want you to see how that affected him. Hell, he didn’t want to truly admit it to himself. Instead, he gestured at the screen. “Let’s play again.”

—-

Dick and Jason had gotten into yet another argument over keeping all of you in the dark, ending with Jason making it physical and Dick throwing him to the floor _again_. It definitely wasn’t the first confrontation, and it sure as hell wouldn’t be the last. He ended up getting up and running to his room in anger. The others knew it would probably be best to leave him alone, but you followed him.

Jason shut his door and moments later heard a light knock. He opened the door to find you, looking at him with concern, and the feeling it gave him didn’t mix well with his rage. Before you could even speak, he yelled at you. “Just leave me the fuck alone, you freak!”

He slammed the door right in your shocked face and soon, the lights in his room flickered violently, then all of the bulbs exploded in a mess of glass. A wave of guilt immediately hit him and he hadn’t expected it. He’d called Rachel the same thing a few weeks before and didn’t really worry too much about it, mostly because she could’ve killed him. But _you_. The image of your face before he shut the door and you apparently being upset enough to blow things up made him feel like the biggest piece of shit. Knowing you, you just wanted to make sure he was okay and he snapped on you.

Jason’s fist went right through the drywall and _fuck_ did it ache, but he knew he deserved it.

—-

The next few weeks, you did just as Jason said. You sparred only with Gar and Rachel during training even though you’d been working with him before, and if the two of you were in the same room, you were on the opposite end. If there was ever a chance of you being alone with him, you’d leave right away. He’d felt bad enough the day it happened, but knowing that you were avoiding him just made him ill. He fucked everything up and he didn’t know how to fix it, not until Gar came to him.

“You need to talk to (Y/N). We’re all tired of it.”

So it wasn’t just him. The others noticed how you were acting too. He rolled his eyes. “I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.”

Gar shook his head, shooting the other boy an annoyed look. “Yeah, you do. She just wanted to make sure you weren’t hurt after Dick hit you and you insulted her. You need to apologize before it gets worse.”

Jason clenched his fists and kept his eyes trained on the wall. He really didn’t need to be reminded of how much of an asshole he’d been, as he was very aware. “Fine. I’ll talk to her if that’ll get you off my back.”

A few hours later, Jason caught you in the kitchen, but as soon as you saw him, you went to leave. “(Y/N), wait.” You paused for a moment then spun around to face Jason, finding him rubbing the back of his neck. For the first time in a long time, his nerves were getting to him, but he had to try and make things right. “Can we talk? We can go up to the roof or something. Where it’s private.”

“Dammit, I told Gar not to say anything to you.” You ran your hand back over your hair with a sigh. “Yeah, we can go up to the roof. As long as you’re not planning to push me off.”

Jason smirked, shoving his hands in his pockets as. “Nah. Not my style.”

“That’s exactly what someone who’s planning to push me off the roof would say,” you smiled at him though, putting him a bit more at ease, and led him up to the roof.

The two of you got there and sat near the edge, neither of you speaking. Jason just watched you as you took in the view of San Francisco at sunset. He didn’t really know where to start, but you spoke before he could even try to say anything. “The city’s so beautiful. Is it anything like Gotham City?”

Jason scoffed. “Hell no. San Francisco’s way nicer to look at. Gotham’s home, but it’s not the greatest place in the world.”

You brought your knees up to your chest and hugged them, looking over at Jason instead of the skyline. “Must be exciting though, living in the big city. My whole life I’ve only ever lived in small towns where everyone knows each other and there’s nothing to do.”

“That explains why you’re so nice.”

“You’re nice, too.” Your voice was quiet, but he still heard you, your words confusing him. _Him? Nice? After treating you like shit?_

“No, I’m not. Especially after what I said to you. You didn’t deserve that.” There it was, out in the open.

“You were angry. People say hurtful things when they’re angry, but it doesn’t mean they’re bad people. Besides, I’ve been called worse things than that in my life.” Jason saw the flash of pain in your eyes, and he had the sudden desire to find the people that had hurt you and make them regret it. “That’s why I kinda liked living in a house with a brain in a robot suit, a guy with a energy being inside of him, and a woman that turns into a giant blob. And Gar obviously. We were all different. We were safe and there was no judgement.”

What you told him left him with a lot of questions, but he stuck with the most important one. “Why did you leave then?”

“I wasn’t gonna let Gar leave on his own. But…” You turned to look back out at the city, your bottom lip between your teeth as if you were debating whether to say more. “At Doom Manor, eventually it felt like I was just going through the motions. I was doing the same old shit every day. Playing games with Gar, watching Rita’s old movies over and over, helping Cliff with the buildings for his little town. Then Gar brought Rachel home, then Dick and Kory showed up and for the first time in a while, life seemed exciting. I felt alive and have ever since. That probably sounds bad…”

Jason was shocked by your openness, and if he was being honest, he knew exactly what you meant. He started talking before he could stop himself, but he wasn’t so sure he wanted to. “No, I get it. All I did before was boost cars and get into fights, but one night, I decided to try and take the wheels off of the Batmobile. Bruce found me…and he gave me a purpose.” That was why he’d been so on edge lately, unfortunately taking some of that out on you. Bruce had changed his life then pawned him off on Dick, who treated him like a clueless child. That was enough to hurt anyone, let alone someone who’d already been through so much.

“I’m sorry,” you said quietly, telling him that you knew what was really going on with him. He supposed it was obvious, since he wasn’t great at hiding his emotions. If anyone else had said sorry like that he would’ve told them to fuck off, but from you, it felt genuine.

“Don’t be.” For a while, there was a comfortable silence between you two, only filled with the sounds of the city below. Eventually, you started laughing, and Jason was caught between confusion and fondness. “What’s so funny?”

You wiped away a tear that escaped as you tried to catch your breath. “I can’t believe you tried to steal the wheels off of the _Batmobile_.”

Jason shrugged, a smile forming on his face. “He shouldn’t have left it parked in Crime Alley.”

“That was still really ballsy. I bet his reaction was hilarious.”

He thought back to that moment and laughed. At the time, he’d thought he was going to get his ass kicked, but ended up with a shocked Bruce instead. You giggled, watching him in the city lights as his laughter died down, but his grin still stayed. He didn’t always smile like that, but with you, it felt right. Finally talking with you after so long made him… _happy_.

“Has anyone ever told you that you have a really nice smile?”

Your words made Jason’s heart skip a beat. Nobody had said anything like that to him before, but even if they had, hearing it from you gave him a very different reaction. He was glad that it was too dark outside, because he could feel the blush on his cheeks. “No, but…thanks.”

He saw a little sparkle in your eye when you smiled at him, thinking for a second that it might mean something, but there was no way. No fucking way. Your voice kept him from getting too deep into his thoughts. “You know, I’ve been curious about you ever since we met. I never expected an autobiography or anything, just the little things, like your favorite movie and stuff like that. That probably sounds so weird, but I like knowing things about my friends. You’re a complete mystery though.”

Hearing you call him a friend stung more than he wanted to admit, but it was better than you hating him for what happened before. The fact that you cared enough to learn about him felt nice though. Unlike some of the others, including you, Jason wasn’t very open about his interests outside of crime fighting, so none of them knew much about him. “I’m not that interesting.”

“I’m sure that’s not true, Jason.” You reached out and put a hand on his shoulder, but that time, it was more of a pleasant buzz than a shock. He couldn’t tell if it was actually from you or if it was just his body reacting to your touch. “I’m really glad that we got everything sorted out. I hated the thought of losing a friend like that.”

There was that word again. _Friend_. Jason trained his eyes on the rooftop, glad you were oblivious to the battling emotions inside of him. He didn’t know what to say to that, so he just kind of said the first thing that came to mind. “Escape From New York.”

You face scrunched up a little in confusion and he couldn’t help the stutter in his heartbeat. “What?”

“Escape From New York. It’s my favorite movie.”

“Really? Good choice. Snake’s a total badass.”

Jason looked at you as if you’d just grown another head, his eyes wide. The more he got to know you, the harder it got to deny any feelings he had, and the fact that you also liked his favorite movie really helped seal it. He was totally and completely screwed.

—-

A few weeks later, everything finally came to a head.

The team, including the new member, Conner, was celebrating a win in the living room at the tower. Everyone had broken off into their own little groups to talk, the separation mostly being between the older and younger members. Jason eyed you from his spot against the wall as you chatted excitedly with Rachel, taking a sip of the soda he held in his hand. You shot him a small smile as the other girl spoke, which he returned.

He’d already thought about you a lot before, but ever since the night on the roof, it was so much worse. You were on his mind in every waking moment, and he dreamt of you every night. For so long, he’d tried to deny it, but he couldn’t anymore. Jason wanted you, he needed you. He knew you didn’t feel the same though. How could you? He was just a street rat, a reject, and you were _amazing_.

Rachel started talking with Gar and Rose and it looked as if you were going to come over to him, but you were suddenly stopped by someone else. Jason watched with disgust as Conner smiled at you, engaging you in a conversation that you should’ve been having with him. Ever since Conner joined the team, Jason disliked him. Unlike the other males on the team, besides him, Conner wasn’t much older than you or someone you saw as a brother. It was very likely that he could steal you away with his boy scout looks and charm.

Just seeing you with him made rage boil in Jason’s chest and he could barely keep it contained, but then you laughed at something Conner said and he exploded. Jason slammed his glass down on a nearby table, making everyone in the room turn towards him, then stalked out of the room with a scowl. There were footsteps following behind him, but he tuned them out, just trying to get to his bedroom so he could work through his outburst in peace. He got to his door and went to open it, but a soft hand on his shoulder stopped him, and he turned to see you. His face softened at the worry in your eyes, though it changed back pretty quickly.

“Jason, what’s wrong?”

He shrugged your hand off and pushed the door open, trying to keep himself from snapping at you in his anger. “Why the fuck do you care?”

You followed behind him as he went into the bedroom, blocking the door when he tried to close you out. “Because I care about _you_.”

“Yeah, right. Just go back to the party. You seemed like you were having fun with the clone.” His voice was tinged with a bitterness he’d never heard in himself, not even when arguing with Dick.

You crossed your arms over your chest, your eyebrows knitting together in confusion. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

He spun around and came very close to you, just inches from your face. “It means you should go hang out with the perfect fucking lab rat. I know that’s what you want.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Jason.” A moment later, a look of realization spread across your face. “Wait, are you…jealous?”

“Hell no,” he scoffed.

“Do you think I don’t want to be friends with you anymore now that Conner’s on the team? Because that’s not true.”

You’d said that word, the one he hated to hear you use to describe your relationship, and he couldn’t take it anymore. “I don’t fucking want to be your friend!”

You gasped, and Jason felt a flash of guilt when he saw your face and how your eyes were already starting to water. “W-why? What did I do?”

“You made me fall in love with you, that’s what you did!” Jason quickly paced the room as your eyes followed him back and forth. “You have no idea what you do to me! I think about you all the time and I fucking hate it! You make me feel all these things that I’ve never felt before and I don’t want it because I know you could never feel the same way about me! Is that what you wanted to hear?!”

He stopped in his tracks, fisting his hair, because he fucking ruined it. He got angry, he got jealous, and now you knew the truth. You wouldn’t want anything to do with him now and he wasn’t sure he could handle that.

“How do you know?”

Your voice was so soft that he almost didn’t hear you, but he barely caught it and glanced up at you. “What?

"How do you know that I could never feel the same way?”

He turned away from you with a humorless laugh. “Come on. I’m just some asshole and you’re… _you_.”

Your hand was on his shoulder again and you encouraged him to face you. He didn’t really want to, not wanting to see the pity in your eyes, so you slipped in front of him. There wasn’t any pity to be seen, mainly just hurt. “Jason, you’re not an asshole…you’re the person I love.”

Jason stared in shock as your hands came up to touch his face, but he grabbed your wrists before you could, his mind not letting him accept what you’d said. “You don’t mean that. You’re just saying it to make me feel better.”

You quickly shook your head. “No, I do mean it. When we first met, I definitely had a crush on you, then we started actually talking and it turned into something more. That’s why it hurt so badly when you told me to leave you alone. I just…I can’t stop thinking about you, Jason.”

He wanted to believe it, he really did, but you were such a good person. In his mind, you were trying to let him down easy. Jason went to argue, but was stopped by you leaning in and pressing your lips to his. They were warm and soft, just like he imagined, as they rolled tenderly over his. He soon relaxed into it, letting go of your wrists, allowing you to cup his face like you’d been trying to do, and his hands slipped down to your waist. You deepened the kiss, moving to wrap your arms around his neck and press your chests together. That same buzz that always happened when you touched him filled his body, making his skin tingle from head to toe. Jason had kissed people before, but none of them felt as good or as right as you did.

After what felt like hours, but not long enough for him, you pulled back with a smile and leaned your forehead against his, your fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. “I love you, Jason. I really do.”

He looked deep into your eyes, finding no trace of a lie, and the warm feeling he always associated with you completely took over. “I love you, too. So fucking much.” He found your lips again, getting lost in the moment that he’d been waiting to have with you for months.

—-

Sunlight filtered through the cracks in the blinds, shining right in Jason’s face and rousing him from his sleep. He opened his eyes, finding himself in his room, tangled up in blankets, and turned to see you laying right next to him, sound asleep. He smiled as he moved closer so he could hold you, and you snuggled into his bare chest. The events of last night played over in his head. The confessions, the kisses, the touches, your soft moans of his name. Part of him woke up worried that it was another dream, but there you were in his bed and in his arms.

He brushed some of the hair that had fallen in your face back behind your ear and you stirred, but thankfully you didn’t wake up just yet. Jason watched fondly as you slept, your peacefulness making him forget about everything else outside of the bed you were sharing.

Eventually, you began to shift and your eyes fluttered open before they focused on him. You wrapped your arms around his waist with a tired smile. “Good morning.”

“Morning.” He couldn’t help the grin caused by your gravelly, sleepy voice. “Sleep well?”

“Yeah, you definitely wore me out. I’m not even sure if I’ll be able to walk during trai…Oh shit!” You suddenly shot up in the bed, fully awake now, not even giving him a chance to get cocky about what you’d said. “We’re gonna be late for training and Dick’s gonna get onto us!”

“Fuck Dick,” he scoffed, sitting up and reaching out to you, but you were a little too far away.

Instead of standing up, you turned back to look at him, legs hanging off the bed. “And here I thought you wanted me to fuck _you_ again, but I see how it is.” You barely held in a laugh as you went to stand and Jason’s arms wrapped around you, pulling you into his chest and bringing you back down into the bed with him.

“Hilarious,” he grumbled into the crook of your neck as you giggled.

Your laughter died down and you turned around in his arms to give him a little peck on the lips. “Alright, you’ve convinced me. Five more minutes.”

He didn’t miss a beat. “How about ten?”

“We’re going to be in so much trouble.”

“Worth it.”

You cuddled back into him with a soft hum and Jason closed his eyes, savoring the feeling of holding you. For the first time he could remember, he was _content_.


End file.
